We were lying in bed on Sunday morning, when C rolled over and pulled me in close to snuggle. She sweetly kissed me and then told me ‘I’ve decided that you can be my first wife.’ I recently downloaded all three seasons of Big Love. ‘No, you can be my first wife.’ I replied. ‘No, you’re going to be my first wife.’ she insisted.
I smiled and said ‘Ok, does this mean you are planning to take a second wife?’ ‘Well, eventually, yes.’ she tells me. ‘Megan would make a good second wife.’ Megan being a much younger class mate, who C thinks is cute. ‘She’d fit in. She’s a feminist and a vegetarian.’ Apparently, all feminist vegetarians naturally get along. I think C just has a thing for pinko, commie – type chicks.
I giggled and asked ‘So do we get to have lots and lots of babies?’ C visibly blanched the way she does any time I bring up the subject of children ‘No.’ she said. I told her what she wanted then was not plural marriage but a harem because the point of the plural marriage on Big Love is to bring souls in to the eternal family, thus all the babies. She clearly was in it for the fun and not some noble, higher purpose.